I’m not sure how it’s only Tuesday.

Once again, I’ve been confronted with the reason I dislike taking time off.

It’s because every time I return,

I find myself doing the same amount of work in one day that should have been spread over two.

It made me take a step back,

and consider what this means.

I realized it isn’t normal to dread time off.

Do other people in other professions do that?

Think about how much work they’ll have waiting for them? Do they work longer and harder days

leading up to time off?

Add in another half day they’d planned to pack with?

Maybe. I don’t know.

The only other comparison I can make

is when I worked retail.

It was lovely.

When I was off, my work brain was 100% free.

It was like the snow screen on tv,

a constant hum of static

with no added weight on the brain.

Not the constant worry

about forgetting or missing something-

FOMO, I guess, but work edition.

Instead of feeling scared I’ll miss the fun,

I worry I’ll be unavailable when someone needs me.

And now that I’m back,

the silent majority of my consciousness is relieved.

For the first time in my life,

I’m beginning to think I may not have an easy time retiring, as I’ve previously thought I would.

And that is something to make one ponder.