This week has worn me down. I find the days go so fast, and yet they seem to all repeat the same thing over and over.

In my little cubicle in the world I deal with microcosms, and have only small windows into the world of others. I really do like being able to help, but it can be so draining emotionally at times, 

like water wearing down the bank of a river.

And then the news- oh god, I read the news. And I weep. So many children and innocents dying across the ocean and I wonder why.

Is it a lack of communication? It’s hard for humans to get along, because we can’t be in another persons head. But such large scale genocide, because it is a genocide, begs the question- how? Why? Who decided that this is the appropriate action to take? 

Choking to death on gases that horrified the world a century earlier 

Watching while your loved ones die.

Holding babies, trying to protect your patients,

Succumbing 

The world watches and holds its breath, this I know. Everyone is frightened of what this means for them

It’s like watching a kid a school being bullied. Some may participate but most slink away, scared of being noticed and being next. 

And if someone stands up, defends? Then the risk shifts. They too may be injured, defeated. Or if they emerge victorious, then what?

Violence begets violence. We all are motivated by the same emotions.

Love, hate, fear, hunger, fatigue,revenge, desire. Basic needs, but we think we are above, that we think, reason

How can we make this neverending ouroboros stop eating its tail?

I want to hold the world in my arms, and tell it everything will be ok, I’m here, 

But I can’t. 

And the news of atrocities pours in, more drops in the bucket of mans evil to man.

I turn away, overwhelmed, and go back to my corner. Do my job, love my people, and try not to think this could happen here, guilty at my lack of action, 

slinking away before the bully